me: Whatever it is, Is, this is our baby and I'm keeping it.
Is: It is easy for you to say but if you remember how much it cost us to have Ramstadt, I thought u'd be more understanding, at least this time. We can always have babies anytime we want.
me: You're growing old... soon a senior next year... and I need to have a daughter to keep this pact alive. I know it's gonna be tough, at least for now, but we'll survive.
Is: *walks away*
I think that's our first major row ever. I felt so sick and so terrible for the whole day after he left for work. Pregnant, sick, a quite bratty son. But Rams totally made my day in the afternoon... he could do his own potty now! That's a huge relief and we could save so much on diapers already... Throughout that afternoon I talked to mom. She took a day off so that she could console me via chatrooms. She understood the motherly feeling towards the seedlings inside... it must be hard to give up. She said if financial wise it's giving us too much a hard time, she's willing to sell off her Bistro and give us the fund. I felt so touched and I really wanted to give her a hug at that moment.
At that moment too, I felt really useless being a woman with no career at all and having to depend on solely my husband. I wish I made another choice... It's suicidal, i must tell you. January couldn't come today cos she had a plan...
Is came home bringing a good news, one of his proposals was bought by the client. That couldn't really help much but that meant a lot to him, it gave him hopes again. When he reached home he apologized for being so unthoughtful in the morning and started to ask about little baby... :) My sickness felt lifted off.
